Literally an Obvious Plant
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The queer alien strikes again!
“I brought her flowers one dusky Tuesday evening when the light was perfect. I pointed out the irony of that romantic old tradition— the severed genitalia of another species, offered as a precopulatory bribe—and then I recited my story just as we were about to fuck.
To this day, I still don’t know what went wrong.”
― Peter Watts, Blindsight
I’d unironically say similar shit. Then again, if I’m bringing flowers to someone, I’d have to be more confident than I’ve ever been.
Picking your own flowers both signals that you care and doesn’t apply the same pressure as buying them. Believe me, girls like the hand picked far better. I just wish girls would give us flowers.