Two hours ago I made a post to !libertyhub@lemmy.blahaj.zone about US politics. I had previously had a good relationship with the head moderator of this community. They’ve encouraged My political posts, and he’s removed comments by people that misgendered Me, and reminded people of My pronouns, like in this thread two days ago:

https://imgur.com/RuNKgM1.png

https://imgur.com/GLT7HR0.png

However, an hour ago in this new thread, the same moderator who was telling people to respect My capitalised pronouns uses lowercase pronouns to address Me:

https://imgur.com/fmGtHvf.png

And he has left up earlier comments which also seemed to misgender Me, and which I specifically pointed out:

https://imgur.com/KZnosuC.png

Even as some users in the thread gender Me correctly:

https://imgur.com/EBuGfom.png

I’m making this thread in the main community because since the mod has banned Me, I can no longer report the comment or leave a reply correcting the pronoun. I would like to gain the attention of @ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone

Misgendering trans people and banning Them at the same time so They can’t do anything about it is not the kind of thing I expect to see on Blahaj. This mod is clearly 100% aware of My pronouns, and made a choice here. I suppose they could be using the general “you”, but it just doesn’t look like that, what with banning Me, telling Me My post isn’t welcome, and telling Me to go to a different community. I used to have a good rapport with this mod, they said several times that they valued My posts. I posted something he disagrees with, and now all of a sudden respecting trans people’s pronouns isn’t a priority anymore. He’s misgendering Me and they’re leaving up comments that also misgender Me. It feels targeted.

EDIT: I cannot seem to embed images. Every time I hit edit and fix the image links and press save, they change to some kind of aussie.zone image proxy link. For now I have left them as links without embedding them.

  • Grail (capitalised)@aussie.zoneOP
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    5 months ago

    When I join a new space, I usually closet about My pronouns and other aspects of My identity on a hard or soft basis until I’ve made a decision to come out of the closet. Misgendering Myself is a safety measure to prevent harassment and abuse. When I am open about My pronouns, there are certain people who will decide to grill Me about every little perceived inconsistency to try to “gotcha” up an excuse to call Me a fake trans person. I usually only gender Myself correctly once I’ve decided to accept the risk of running into that kind of person.

    Aside from judging a space to see if it’s safe, in some spaces it can help to introduce Myself closeted and then come out, rather than start out being honest about My identity. There’s a lot of people on sites like Lemmy that will call a new user who uses neopronouns a troll. Only being honest about My identity after I’ve proven I’m no troll is safer.