• Alwaysnownevernotme@lemmy.world
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    17 days ago

    Citizens please retrieve your firearms and form up at the beach.

    We have diverted funding for sanitation services to purchase 12,000 rounds of eaglecock incendiary shells and 48,000 rounds of Orangeman red white and blue tracer ammunition.

    This wet windy boy is going home in a box.

    • TransplantedSconie@lemm.ee
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      17 days ago

      300 lb diabetes ridden Gravy Seals line up wheezing and coughing in the wind and the rain

      “Come get them, Obama!!”

      firing at the storm commences as many are swept away in the storm surge

  • 14th_cylon@lemm.ee
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    17 days ago

    cat 5 wet windy thing is approaching, but don’t worry, we’ll fix it. president camacho has concept of a plan. and a sharpie. and some nukes.

    • shani66@ani.social
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      17 days ago

      Don’t you put that evil on Camacho, he was one of the best qualified people at the time and as soon as someone better proved they were better he have them the reigns. That’s better then most presidents we’ve ever had.

    • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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      16 days ago

      Why do I envision this is my timeshare cat, after sneaking over in the rain… with bad gas….?

    • WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
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      16 days ago

      Oh don’t worry - Mega-genius Elon Musk will massively expand the space force with his brilliant, bargain basement equipment, so I expect they’ll finally get around to doing something about those pesky Jewish space lasers. Exercising military control over space is good for security and stability. Everything is great.

      I’m not sure I could imagine a more catastrophically stupid timeline.

    • Allonzee@lemmy.worldOP
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      16 days ago

      I’m ok with that, since our species has clearly accepted mass suicide in the form of the reverse terraforming of our only habitat to be hostile towards our species for private short term profit.

      If we don’t value human life having a survivable habitat beyond the next few decades, why should we value it next hurricane season?

      🤷

      Wouldn’t have been my choice, but that doesn’t change the reality.

  • lemmy_outta_here@lemmy.world
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    16 days ago

    If you’re LGBTQ or a racial/religious minority, the wet and windy thing that is coming to kill you was just elected president