I get furious when people use my addiction as an excuse to do something. “I had to take the keys away from you, or you might go out and get messed up!” or “I was worried you were going to relapse so I called these people to prevent you from going to that place.” etc. In general, these people violate my boundaries and take no accountability for it, saying instead that it’s my fault for being an addict. “Well if you don’t like us doing that to you, then don’t use!” It feels so abusive.

If I didn’t ask you to help me, you don’t get to use my addiction as an excuse to do anything.

I didn’t ask you to take the keys away, so that was your choice, and you are responsible for the pain it caused.

I didn’t ask you to call my friends and have them stop me from using, so that was your choice, and you are responsible for the pain it caused.

If it isn’t consensual it isn’t help, it’s abuse.