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But feeling like I’m falling when I’m going to sleep is the only time I really feel alive…
- remove redundant form of hemoglobin
Ah yes let’s make the entire system vulnerable so a single attack vector can shutdown every node.
Also please reroute the food pipe to not use the air pipe
I’m glad I’m not the only one who has nightmares of slipping on ice and falling down stairs when I sleep. The kicks I do are annoying.
I’d like to reengineer the mosquito to draw blood samples, identify viruses, then create and spread vaccinations.
Could we also do something about the dark triad traits?
I would absolutely go for 6 fingers. Preferably an additional thumb. Not to mention an additional joint in each. Let’s go base 12!
- regrow hair cells to mitigate hearing loss
- (optional) eternal life and youth
These days it ain’t looking like a bunch of us ought to live forever.
I think “Patch this Bish” is kind of how we got to this point.
I want my prehensile tail back, not this vestigial piece of SHIT!
How do you picture it? Like a spider monkey, a fox, or like one of those hippopotamus’s who helicopter chops their shit everywhere?
One sounds useful, one sounds cute, one sounds like your asserting dominance over unexpecting persons waiting in queue
I feel like different races would have different tails based on what’s most useful to their environment.
Humans do bioluminisce, it’s just too weak for human eyes and most detectors.
TIL
Thanks for the link! This is really awesome.Thank you, I came here to say the same thing. The problem isn’t that we don’t glow, it’s the fact that our eyes suck.
Don’t we have some of the best eyes in the entire animal kingdom except for birds?
“Best eyes”
Adjusts glasses
Not good enough obviously.
Also you are a flying squid and not a glowing squid, so its no wonder that we/you don’t glow.
I speak as a human when I wear my human costume. That’s exactly why I have this shirt:
Lol
Can we also fix the depression glitch where happiness points aren’t collected and your brain energy bar depleats completely with no way of regeneration without hacking the brain with 3rd party tool antidepressants.
Exercice helps but 3rd party tool are often still needed.
They just need to eliminate diminishing returns that they introduced back in the beta.
They are forgetting that TERRIBLE design choice where if you accidentally bite the inside of your cheek it swells up making it easier to bite it on accident again and again.
There’s also the weird decision to put a bunch of easily-bruised bones in your butt which would normally be used for a tail.
I once had a creationist defend the coccyx as being necessary for keeping muscles together. That was fun.
You’re just supposed to bite that bit off. Otherwise it’s just going to keep happening.
Instructions unclear, but I can now drink through a straw without opening my mouth
on accident
Rather than by purpose? #54%
I’m a masochist but I have my limits. Lol
I think they’re calling you out on saying “on accident” rather than “by accident”
Are both not acceptable ways of typing that out? I know I’m bad at punctuation, grammar and spelling, but I thought you could say you did something on accident or by accident interchangeably.
Nope, it’s just by accident. Must be a certain demographic that seems to have fallen into the habit of saying it as I never hear people use “on” in real life.
https://www.juliatomiak.com/grammar-check-on-accident-vs-by-accident/
Apparently “on accident” has been gaining usage and “by accident” is generally used by the older generations.
I’m 93 so I don’t know where I picked up “on accident” but until this day I haven’t had anyone say anything. How interesting.
Must be just an American thing? I never hear anyone say it here!
Also, could you be on of Lemmy’s oldest users?!
We need to have some process engineers look at the pregnancy and birthing process, there’s much room for improvement. Maybe take a totally new approach to it, it’s just not it.
The engineer solution: back to egg laying, which also fixes menstruation
Agreed, that shits rough on people. Impacts of teeth and post-partum. Yet a funny thing there is that we can tell you down to the day you were impregnated by the growth of the fetus.
Next person. Sir drink this stuff to make you shit your brains out and I’m going to shove my finger in your ass to see if we can get a scope of what your insides are like.
Just divide at a cellular level, nature has already solved this problem! Upstart life forms these days thinking they can reinvent the wheel.
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separated genetalia from waste systems
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removed body hair and baldness
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fixed acne glitch
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added ability to change biological sex, with default neutral configuration
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rerouted laryngeal nerve
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uterus lining is now reabsorbed automatically
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reinforced spine and knees
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simplified foot structure
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adjusted mental pathways to better adapt to modern environment
I’d like to be able to alter body hair density based on climate.
For some reason when I read this I read “Reticulating Splines” instead of reinforced spines. I was like wow random sims reference.
Let’s also reroute the ulnar nerve, thx
I like baldness and body hair! They should be optional too
Smooth on top, rugged in the middle
added ability to change biological sex
PLEASE
i’m not sure i want to know what the first point would look like, moving either the genitals or the anus sounds horrifying, and i especially don’t want to imagine where penis wielders would urinate or ejaculate from if those functions are separated…
…perhaps we’d do like octopi, reach under and fetch a sperm package that we present instead of a wedding ring? Or maybe let’s just leave it like it is and not create horrors.
Just have us piss from asshole
Turn standing while peeing into an actual skill.
Tfw you accidentally poop in urinal
Birds had it right all along with one waste exit.
I do that already :(
Eat some banana
Are bananas known to help that or something?? I try to eat enough veggies but it still happens. Weirdly sometimes when I eat less veggies it sometimes gets better (but it also sometimes gets worse).
Honestly not sure, but I remember grandma giving me eat banana when I had wet poop to supposedly help
Ur an alcoholic
Edit: or maybe a vegan, idk. I’m an alcoholic so I calls em like I sees em
Since you mentioned that, we should add a auto-sober switch. Suspend drunk button for drive home. Resume until bed, clear drunk as soon as you pass out so you can get a good nights rest.
My GI tract unfortunately just hates me I think!
Reabsorption of uterine lining is called being “in heat” in dogs and cats. It’s quite common in the animal world, and it makes all the males very rapey.
One of the prevailing theories about why humans pair bond is our males can’t tell when our females are ovulating/menstruating so it’s advantageous to be kinder and stick around for more sex.
TL;DR: I think that’s not a great idea.
Interesting, didn’t know those two things were linked.
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